There is something so unbelievably adorable about the way Hayden Panettiere (of the dolphin-saving video) says “fuck.”

Awwwwwwwww! She is just so stinkin’ cute!

On a related note, but this one interactive, you must visit palinaspresident.com. See if you can find Katie Couric being waterboarded just outside the Oval Office. Yowch!

Okay, finally: RUDE PUNDIT, WHOEVER YOU ARE, WE LOVE YOU!

“You lost, man, you lost because all the shit you been shoveling into a giant pile has finally tipped over and covered you in turds. I’ll tell you what I’m gonna do. Right here, right now, I’m take out this skull. You see it? You know whose skull it is? It’s Ronald Reagan’s. And now I’m gonna take out my dick and fuck his skull, right in his eyehole where his lying-ass twinkling eyeballs used to be. Watch me fuck the Gipper’s skull, man, watch me turn it into my bony bitch. Damn, that was good fuckin’. And then, once I’m president, I’m gonna get Milton Friedman’s skull and fuck the shit out of that. And I’m gonna get William Rehnquist’s skull and fuck it. And then I’m gonna get William F. Buckley’s skull, even if it’s still got meat on it, and I’m gonna fuck it in the mouth. I’m gonna skull fuck all those people who turned this country into a bullshit version of what it was. Shit, I’m gonna fuck Dick Cheney’s skull while he’s still using it, maybe get Joe Biden to double team it with me, fuckin’ his skull until his poisoned fuckin’ heart explodes.

Thanks, man!

With every debate, the Rude Pundit likes to give his version of how Obama or Biden really ought to answer the really asinine, idiot-baiting questions. From today’s would-be transcript, we get what Obama’s answer to that Bill Ayers bullshit should be. Some highlights:

“Oh, fuck me, really? Okay, fine. You want me to talk about this shit? Here ya go: he’s a dude on my street who held a coffee get-together for me years ago when I was gonna run to be the state senator of his ‘hood. And we served at the same time on the board of the Woods Fund. You know what the Woods Fund does? It tries to help community organizers in Chicago get shit done for the poor, you know, like education, housing, and jobs. Now, Sarah Palin may think that community organizers don’t do jack shit, but we did the work the government wouldn’t or couldn’t do. So, yeah, Ayers was there. But ‘pal around’ with him? Motherfucker, we followed Robert’s Rules of Order together. Maybe for people who scream at and abuse their friends that counts as being ‘pals,’ but for most of us, it ain’t even an ‘acquaintance.’ Dude, Johnny, you signed a confession that degraded America when you were over in ‘Nam. And I’m the traitor?

“So you can have your Muppet-sounding idiot VP bitch out there in front of crowds, talkin’ smack about me and gettin’ people to yell, ‘Kill him,’ and you can try to convince everyone I’m a terrorist. …But you know and I know that you’re desperate. Motherfucker, you tied yourself to Reagan and Bush and now that ideology is sinkin’ like cement shoes on a mob snitch. Drown, motherfucker, drown.

“And you’re in the shit now. ‘Cause I’ve been waitin’ for this moment, you fuckin’ senile old fuck. I was waitin’ until I could see the whites of your twitchy fuckin’ eyes to pull the trigger on the Keating Gatling gun I’ve been holdin’. You wanted to take the gloves off. Then why are your hands shakin’, bitch? You can send your people out there to say that you were cleared, but the name sticks, doesn’t it? ‘Keating Five’? I wasn’t gonna go there, but you teed up the ball. I just swung the fuckin’ club. Now, lemme ask you somethin’. What’s more important - that some guy who did some shit four decades ago once said, ‘Hi’ to me or that you are one of the reasons that the federal government had to bail out the savings and loan industry? Moral equivalence doesn’t work, does it, Johnny Mac?

Read the rest of the rudeness here.